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[–]squid50s 2885 points2886 points  (46 children)

SrGrafo, what happened to this? It said “I’ll see you in 95 days”. That post is now 95 days old.

[–]SrGrafoSrGrafo[S] 2371 points2372 points  (34 children)

[–]Araedox 819 points820 points  (7 children)

I had a calendar event named “SrGrafo Crisis”. I didn’t remember what it was until now. I was expecting like a time travel event or something like that.

[–]AVID_BIRD_OBSERVER 387 points388 points  (5 children)

I have a calendar event named “feed 🇺🇸Grandkids🇺🇸” that pops up every damn day and I cannot recall what the damn thing is for and have been posting conspiracy theories on Facebook for the past 8 months about what the homosexual phruit phone guy is trying to pull here

[–]tepkel 117 points118 points  (2 children)

It's clearly the deep state trying to insert socialism into your family. If your grandkids want to eat, they should work for their own food. Not leach off of hardworking, patriotic, subterranean lizard people like you.

[–]uhihia 91 points92 points  (16 children)

So wholesome!

[–]Faramirezr 52 points53 points  (14 children)

Wait... What happened in the original timeline!?

[–]uhihia 68 points69 points  (11 children)

He rolled a 1

[–]Icommentoncrap 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Lol I was expecting them to be the reason why the father died

[–]uhihia 42 points43 points  (8 children)

The time police don't see time like how we do. 95 days for them could be 1 year in our time.

[–]kaenneth 23 points24 points  (6 children)

Or tuesdays. or July. or sometimes never. or sometimes the moment when nothing never occurs.

[–]uhihia 13 points14 points  (5 children)

Ahh the jeremy bearimy

[–]GunNNife 8 points9 points  (4 children)

The dot above the "i" is what gets me.

[–]SuicideBonger 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Yeah Yeah we've all seen the time knife

[–]nmezib 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I SAW THE TIME KNIFE?!

[–]SctchWhsky 5 points6 points  (0 children)

But... how!?

[–]PeppermintPhatty 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That broke me.

[–]SSaini89 493 points494 points  (10 children)

Implying you had sex.

[–]SrGrafoSrGrafo[S] 667 points668 points  (5 children)

[–]Kakss_ 270 points271 points  (0 children)

For more

[–]SurpriseDragon 53 points54 points  (0 children)

You can raid my Area 51 anytime bby

[–]relddir123 13 points14 points  (1 child)

Wait, are you married/in a relationship?

[–]WatsMyPasswordAgain 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Nerdy girls need dick too.

[–]SrGrafoSrGrafo[S] 1695 points1696 points  (101 children)

[–]GameCreeper 1081 points1082 points  (63 children)

2 streamers got arrested for 3 days and fined like 30k tho

edit: 4k each, not 30k

[–]GTX2GvO 496 points497 points  (23 children)

It was about a 4K fine (each I think).

I know, because those dorks are from my country and therefor it was well covered on the news here.

[–]straydog1980 36 points37 points  (5 children)

I mean that's a fine resolution

[–]gwaydms 23 points24 points  (4 children)

Which country?

[–]Theopeo1 28 points29 points  (2 children)

Netherlands

[–]GTX2GvO 8 points9 points  (0 children)

/\____

[–]StuffIsayfor500Alex 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Netherlands sending their best! I expected more from the home team but happy to have you on board the alien ship.

[–]rgr_b 3 points4 points  (0 children)

G E K O L... meh, nevermind

[–]YuGoZZ 88 points89 points  (25 children)

A man got arrested for peeing in front of the guards.

[–]Dadalot 159 points160 points  (15 children)

Naruto peeing

[–]Entercheesynamehere 61 points62 points  (11 children)

Naruto clapping alien cheeks

[–]corpsmanh 13 points14 points  (10 children)

I need pictures, the truth must be known.

[–]Entercheesynamehere 44 points45 points  (8 children)

Naruto pictures

[–]cobbl3 33 points34 points  (3 children)

I can't believe you've done this.

[–]AnatidaephobicDuck03 8 points9 points  (0 children)

damb I said “aw fuck” right before seeing your message

[–]Th3SmartAlec 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Area 51 guards fall for it everytime.

[–]AlGeee 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Sounds messy

[–]advertentlyvertical 11 points12 points  (0 children)

you gotta tuck it properly so the stream trails behind you. increasing the pressure can give a slight speed boost

[–]TearShitDown 3 points4 points  (6 children)

He could end up being registered as a sex offender for that

[–]joezoo66 110 points111 points  (22 children)

I'm just happy not many people went

[–]ChrisTheGeek111 68 points69 points  (18 children)

Yeah, it could've easily turned into another Fyre Festival.

[–]rocky8u 132 points133 points  (14 children)

I don't know, nobody promised anything, so it wouldn't surprise anybody of there was nothing prepared for the people who showed.

The Fyre Festival was a bunch of people who paid for tickets to an exclusive event and got virtually nothing for it.

[–]awholetadstrange 34 points35 points  (4 children)

So it's the anti-Fyre Festival.

[–]gwaydms 59 points60 points  (3 children)

The Hold Your Fyre Festival

[–]Cky_vick 22 points23 points  (5 children)

What do you mean? They got stranded on an island, some people got robbed, and everyone got lied to!

[–]pinktini 26 points27 points  (1 child)

That's definitely not what they were expecting though. They saw a video selling private yacht experiences and high-end yurts to live in. Expected like sushi and 5 star restaurant food.

No one was expecting that kind of stuff for the Area 51 storming session lol.

[–]ommnian 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah... but I'm not sure thats quite what they were expecting..

[–]Lasagna4Brains 2 points3 points  (1 child)

And none of that applies to the area 51 raid.

[–]xtrozia 24 points25 points  (0 children)

That one Naruto runner is a hero

[–]the_GamingDead 659 points660 points  (44 children)

Guard: "What are you, some kind of Dinosaur?"

Raider: "Don't you guys know Naruto?"

Guards: "What??"

Raiders [shocked]: "What???"

[–]spiral_divergence 194 points195 points  (6 children)

As a former Airman, I can tell you that Security Forces guys were very often huge nerds and would most likely know Naruto

[–]Normrum9 32 points33 points  (3 children)

[–]spiral_divergence 11 points12 points  (2 children)

I guess I haven’t seen the video you’re referencing, but I wouldn’t really be surprised if they were contracting out gate security. Wouldn’t be the first time.

[–]Xaevier 97 points98 points  (16 children)

Having been in the air force I can say with confidence that anyone young/low rank enough to be stuck on guard duty knows Naruto

Air Force is where they put all the weebs that get in the military

[–]Cyberblood 62 points63 points  (8 children)

Air Force is where they put all the weebs that get in the military

And Japan's 43 years long plan to never again get atomic bomb dropped is finally complete.

[–]cry666 16 points17 points  (4 children)

Dropping bombs on Japan is now considered heresy

[–]Cyberblood 13 points14 points  (2 children)

I dont play Civilization, but I think this is what they call a "Cultural Victory"

[–]Cryorm 13 points14 points  (4 children)

Lies, I'm a dirty weeb and I'm in the Army, not air force

[–]BertBanana 8 points9 points  (0 children)

As a Marine that knew plenty of weebs. I'd have to agree with OP. Airforce had more weebs per capita.

[–]ObsceneGesture4u 160 points161 points  (12 children)

Nani!?!?!

[–]grandboyman 44 points45 points  (11 children)

Fun fact . Nani means Who in Swahili

[–]FauxReal 36 points37 points  (9 children)

Nani means pretty in Hawaiian.

[–]Pyro_Maniacal 18 points19 points  (4 children)

Nani means grandmother from your mother's side in Urdu.

[–]LokisDawn[🍰] 10 points11 points  (1 child)

Technically you could call that your maternal grandmother.

[–]coranos2 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Something about ‘get on Facebook’

[–]Volt_Prime 9 points10 points  (1 child)

You’ve never played tuber simulator?

[–]djnewton123 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You know it's fun, right?

[–]awholetadstrange 15 points16 points  (0 children)

That exchange will go down in history.

[–]fibojoly 5 points6 points  (0 children)

ばかな ! (°Д°;)

[–]GTX2GvO 3068 points3069 points  (88 children)

Plot twist.

Man actually got in and indeed die by "natural causes" due to the alien virus he contracted inside.

Nothing else was retrieved from the facility.

[–]SrGrafoSrGrafo[S] 3369 points3370 points  (70 children)

[–]hurtsdonut_ 1588 points1589 points  (21 children)

Died clapping alien cheeks.

[–]acslathar 645 points646 points  (9 children)

I want this on my tombstone

[–]Lukthar123 135 points136 points  (6 children)

Just lie lmao

[–]jpstroop 157 points158 points  (5 children)

I thought you said “Just die lmao” at first. Like wow dude

[–]TheFuckingWriter 34 points35 points  (1 child)

I guess it just depends on how fast he wants it to be on his tombstone

[–]SoundOfOneHand 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Buy the tombstone now, save it for later. You’ll need it someday!

[–]sonrad10 8 points9 points  (1 child)

I mean, generally you do have to be dead to have a tombstone

[–]AbsoluteZeroK 35 points36 points  (6 children)

Doesn't matter. Had sex.

[–]Hungry_Grump 5 points6 points  (1 child)

She put a bag on my head.

[–]daynjahzonee 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Still counts!

[–]YuGoZZ 129 points130 points  (3 children)

[–]JusHerForTheComments 34 points35 points  (2 children)

Digimon. Digital Monsters. Digimon are the CHAMPIONS!

Edit: reference

[–]rayne128 50 points51 points  (1 child)

I think he referenced cactuar from the final fantasy series

[–]SirWyncko 184 points185 points  (6 children)

wait a minute... that isn't a duck!

[–]GTX2GvO 55 points56 points  (3 children)

Who claims Ducks have exclusivity on Grafo?
He's a free man you know.

[–]turtlepowerpizzatime 7 points8 points  (1 child)

You don't know that for a fact. He could be in prison and he passes the time drawing and when he gets library time, he posts them on reddit.

[–]GTX2GvO 29 points30 points  (18 children)

And now you make me wonder what the Alien got from this interaction.

[–]fluffspeed 50 points51 points  (15 children)

Pregnant

[–]badloop 48 points49 points  (14 children)

Pergnet??

[–]ThePoltageist 43 points44 points  (12 children)

PREGANENANT?!?

[–]yeah_yeah_therabbit 40 points41 points  (6 children)

Pregante!

[–]Lonescu 9 points10 points  (4 children)

DANGER OPS

[–]AceArchangel 9 points10 points  (1 child)

PRANGENT SEX?

[–]oskan511 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Will it hurt baby top of his head??!

[–]awholetadstrange 24 points25 points  (4 children)

Preganté.

[–]advertentlyvertical 15 points16 points  (3 children)

will never not enjoy this reference...mostly cause this one sounds like pasta sauce

[–]Cael87 3 points4 points  (0 children)

how is babby formed? How alien get pragnent?

[–]S1ayer 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Looks like Isaac (binding of isaac) with Maggy's Bow and Ipecac.

[–]punsforgold 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Amazing...

[–]banjowashisnameo 38 points39 points  (0 children)

Mom, why does this new global epidemic called Narutolepsy has dads picture against it in wikipedia?

[–]Deshra 14 points15 points  (1 child)

First words inside; “HAS ANYONE SEEN FOX MULDER’S SISTER?!?”

[–]sinan810 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The aliens took the dad's DNA and impregnated his wife. That's how Joseph Gribble and his half-sister were born.

[–]SirWyncko 982 points983 points  (23 children)

[–]SrGrafoSrGrafo[S] 1367 points1368 points  (22 children)

[–]Kakss_ 435 points436 points  (4 children)

ohno

[–]OpeningTrain1 310 points311 points  (3 children)

ohyea

[–]Notgaylikesdick 156 points157 points  (1 child)

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

[–]PhoenixLord01 74 points75 points  (0 children)

Name checks out

[–]wombatcombat123 59 points60 points  (0 children)

Bro Manuel a cutie

[–]ehrwien 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Vielleicht ist das gar nicht deine Freundin, sondern Manuel Neuer...

[–]AnonymouslyJordan 28 points29 points  (6 children)

[–]Jaredop 33 points34 points  (5 children)

It's not gay if it's an alien

[–]UnescortedStoner 17 points18 points  (3 children)

It's not even beastiality... It's just how things go.

[–]Azkappa 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Alien dude cheek is still cheek.

[–]Etamin13 650 points651 points  (12 children)

nice butt srgrafo

[–]SrGrafoSrGrafo[S] 978 points979 points  (10 children)

[–]uhihia 290 points291 points  (3 children)

He is starting at your penis now.

[–]ThatOneWeirdName 114 points115 points  (2 children)

Actually his lower half is just on backwards. When he’s really happy you can see his tail straighten up

[–]poohster33 11 points12 points  (0 children)

We've made our choice.

[–]goatcoat 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Just take a compliment.

[–]S011110M4112 133 points134 points  (1 child)

"Mommy, how did daddy die."

"Raid."

"Daddy drank an entire can of roach spray?"

"No, dear. Something far stupider."

[–]YuGoZZ 472 points473 points  (11 children)

[–]azdcf 228 points229 points  (1 child)

[–]NanoBuc 36 points37 points  (0 children)

Now I wish Area 51 was actually in Florida

[–]League0fGaming 428 points429 points  (9 children)

He died a hero

[–]SrGrafoSrGrafo[S] 797 points798 points  (5 children)

[–]838h920 72 points73 points  (2 children)

Next time you should make sure your insurance covers heroic deaths. Atleast you're not the military who forgot to add this to the insurance plan for all their soldiers.

[–]GTX2GvO 383 points384 points  (19 children)

Offtopic.

On a scale of 1 to 10.
How drunk did you get from celebrating your birthday?

[–]SrGrafoSrGrafo[S] 703 points704 points  (18 children)

[–]Kakss_ 136 points137 points  (10 children)

You can dance on my table all you want ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )

[–]uhihia 52 points53 points  (8 children)

Is that offer available for me?

[–]Kakss_ 70 points71 points  (7 children)

(눈‸눈)

no

[–]uhihia 34 points35 points  (6 children)

But me want dance

[–]Kakss_ 69 points70 points  (4 children)

Only SrGrafo

(눈‸눈)

Can dance

(ヘ・_・)ヘ┳━┳

ON MY TABLE

(ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻

[–]GTX2GvO 29 points30 points  (3 children)

Hmmmm.....

What is your opinion about dancing With your table?

[–]Kakss_ 50 points51 points  (2 children)

Hmmmm...

( ͡° ͟ʖ ͡°)

5$ per dance. And no groping

(⸟ ͟ʖ⸟)

[–]jonnyslippers 11 points12 points  (1 child)

I wood take that deal.

[–]GTX2GvO 9 points10 points  (0 children)

*Reads chart*

That would be a solid seven. Maybe even eight.

[–]thatonemurphy 3 points4 points  (0 children)

But did you give the chair a lap dance? (Happy belated birthday)

[–]AntiqueHoover 143 points144 points  (12 children)

There was an SUV that crashed into a mall and drove around in it yesterday near my hometown. People were saying the driver was looking for Area 51 but ended up at Forever 21 instead

Here’s an article about it.

[–]knowspickers 59 points60 points  (1 child)

"Was he shot?" "No, he tripped and hit his head. If only he had his arms in front of him!"

[–]Hydroblaze1999 152 points153 points  (8 children)

[–]DOPEDupNCheckedOut 54 points55 points  (6 children)

They don't have to be cute when they can mind control me via tentacle thru my butt.

[–]inckorrect 13 points14 points  (4 children)

Is it mind control or is it puppetry?

[–]DOPEDupNCheckedOut 8 points9 points  (2 children)

Well I mean, it started as prostate stimulation, but it just kept going and going and going and going, next thing I know he's (maybe it was a she? I'm not too sure) jabbing at my penial gland. Idk maybe it was a miscommunication due to the language barrier, but that has been disolved.... Because... We are.... Now... O N E.

[–]Your_real_watermelon 23 points24 points  (0 children)

I’m trying to figure out if your characters are supposed to be naked all the time or not. That butt is dangerously thicc.

[–]TuskedOdin 13 points14 points  (0 children)

SrGrafo claps alien cheeks confirmed

[–]uhihia 20 points21 points  (1 child)

The question is what was he running into grab? Pokeballs? SrGrafo edits?

[–]KiwiChoppa147 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Don’t forget to use shadow clone jutsu to multiply your numbers

[–]joezoo66 9 points10 points  (0 children)

It was quite a cool event

[–]Igotthisnameguys 5 points6 points  (2 children)

You mean natural selection

[–]Ayy-lmao213 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Doesn't really work if he already had a kid

[–]aamedor 6 points7 points  (0 children)

So Area 51 is where you got the watch in the successful raid in the original timeline and the last 95 days has been grafo distracting the geeks so the raid fails in this timeline closing the time paradox

[–]Davetopay 6 points7 points  (1 child)

This assumes that someone going to the raid has ever had sex.

[–]ZonaGeeWon 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I'm glad this whole thing ended in camaraderie under the banner of aliens, almost wholesome really. :)

[–]TheGam3rDud3 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Jesus Christ that’s SrGrafo!

[–]shuboni 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Did you finally find the cat girls?

[–]Strypes4686 3 points4 points  (0 children)

"Sorry Mario ! The Cat-Girls are at another cast--- base"

[–]Kedamos 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Dying to retrieve the only copy of Hl3 from the military looks to me like an honorable death !

[–]DOPEDupNCheckedOut 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Ughhhhh SrGrafo why are you so funny. Please kiss me and take my wife.

[–]C0AL1T10N 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Bold of you to assume that somebody who Naruto runs has a wife and a kid

[–]orgeezuz 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Narutal cause

[–]am_I_dead_yet_ 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Natural selection* FTFY

[–]DOOManiac 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Lead Poisoning

[–]TheBaltimoron 4 points5 points  (0 children)

"As a hero, Junior. As a hero."

[–]LordRedB 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I know none of your characters wear pants...

But dat ass

[–]Existential_gays 2 points3 points  (0 children)

"Daddy clapped some alien cheeks"

[–]cfox0835 2 points3 points  (0 children)

"Your father was severely mentally ill, and committed suicide by soldier"

[–]Rhamni 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Damn, he was killed by a ninja?

[–]lessobvious 2 points3 points  (0 children)

"RUNNING LIKE A DINOSAUR OR SOMETHING"